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Well...fornicate the illegitimate. Did a pressure test and one of the glue joints has a slight leak. So it's back to square one -- after a trip to the hardware store, because I used myself out of PVC glue. Drunken rambling thread, here I come.
We're all a mess of paradoxes. Believing in things we know can't be true. We walk around carrying feelings too complicated and contradictory to express. But when it all becomes too big, and words aren't enough to help get it all out, there's always music.
The 12.12.12 concert - presented to you by a bunch of corporations and foundations of the 1%. You know, the people that actively deny climate change and obstruct doing things to prevent storms like Sandy from getting worse than they should have been. Or the people that push horrific austerity measures making it more difficult to recover from such storm - so some jackass multimillionaires can take home huge bonuses and not have a dime spent on helping the people in Rockaway, Staten Island, New Jersey, etc...
Post by abrakapokus on Dec 13, 2012 15:22:23 GMT -5
I just got a call from my cousin that my Uncle died. He's the only Uncle or family member outside of my parents and brother that I'm close to at all. He had a heart attack last week and has been in ICU. Things were looking better and they were hoping to do a bypass this week. Apparently the tried switching the respirator and he coded.
He moved here, from WV, to live on my parent's farm a few years ago. Out of 12 children my Dad and him were only 18 months apart and inseparable. I am worried mostly for my Dad. I've never seen him break down and sob. When I had to call him today he did just that. Repeating over and over "My Brother, my best friend...my Brother, my best friend." The kids are sad but okay, they are worried mostly about the fate of Pappy's dogs.
I'm regretting all the times I didn't stop by and just chat with him on the porch. The times I didn't make it a point to call him when I knew he was lonely. When I didn't bring the boys by often enough.
Post by krunchykat on Dec 13, 2012 15:27:42 GMT -5
I'm so very sorry abra. Sending positive vibes to you and your family. In the meantime, don't beat yourself up over the things you should have done, but instead remember the good times and memories. Hugs to you.
Post by itrainmonkeys on Dec 13, 2012 15:29:57 GMT -5
So sorry to hear that abra. That's terrible. I've been fortunate enough to not have lost anyone recently so I think sometimes I take for granted the time I have left with family members. Maybe I need to re-evaluate some things. Hope your dad gets through this as best he can.
I just got a call from my cousin that my Uncle died. He's the only Uncle or family member outside of my parents and brother that I'm close to at all. He had a heart attack last week and has been in ICU. Things were looking better and they were hoping to do a bypass this week. Apparently the tried switching the respirator and he coded.
He moved here, from WV, to live on my parent's farm a few years ago. Out of 12 children my Dad and him were only 18 months apart and inseparable. I am worried mostly for my Dad. I've never seen him break down and sob. When I had to call him today he did just that. Repeating over and over "My Brother, my best friend...my Brother, my best friend." The kids are sad but okay, they are worried mostly about the fate of Pappy's dogs.
I'm regretting all the times I didn't stop by and just chat with him on the porch. The times I didn't make it a point to call him when I knew he was lonely. When I didn't bring the boys by often enough.
That's horrible news. Hopefully time will help your Father, your family, and you with this huge loss!
So sorry to hear this, love These things are not easy to handle. All of the "what-if's" and "I-should-have's" won't do you any good. Just try and use that for changes in your future. You were a wonderful niece to him, I'm sure, and he knew you loved him Positive vibes to you and your entire family at this time...
I'm sorry Abra. My heart goes out to you, Dave & the boys. I love you guys so let me know if there's anything I can do.
And in general, Inforoosters need some good news soon, it's been a rough couple of weeks for some long-standing members and some of the nicest people I know.
First off, apologies for the BS plumbing kvetch...I didn't do a good job going back through the last few posts before I jumped in. Jeez. No way I'd've been that flippant.
Karosko: I don't know you personally but I feel for you as I feel for everyone who has and does struggle with cancer. I lost a beloved grandmother to melanoma when I was in college and then my wife beat breast cancer last year. Both situations sucked to deal with but we got through them and after a while, looked back and realized how much closer we were as a family. So I wish you and your family the best. Tides do turn.
Ah Abra - I'm so sorry. I understand about the regrets - it's human nature - remember to tell your boys more about what it was that you liked and loved about him. I always think that's the best way to remember someone and respect them after they've passed. Best wishes from DC.
Post by Dave Maynar on Dec 13, 2012 17:42:41 GMT -5
I just wanted to say that we really appreciate the outpouring of support from everyone on here. It's still amazing to see how great everyone is to each other on here.
I just got a call from my cousin that my Uncle died. He's the only Uncle or family member outside of my parents and brother that I'm close to at all. He had a heart attack last week and has been in ICU. Things were looking better and they were hoping to do a bypass this week. Apparently the tried switching the respirator and he coded.
He moved here, from WV, to live on my parent's farm a few years ago. Out of 12 children my Dad and him were only 18 months apart and inseparable. I am worried mostly for my Dad. I've never seen him break down and sob. When I had to call him today he did just that. Repeating over and over "My Brother, my best friend...my Brother, my best friend." The kids are sad but okay, they are worried mostly about the fate of Pappy's dogs.
I'm regretting all the times I didn't stop by and just chat with him on the porch. The times I didn't make it a point to call him when I knew he was lonely. When I didn't bring the boys by often enough.
F*ck, Dee. I'm so sorry to hear this. My brother is my best friend too and I don't know that I'd be able to handle it if he had suddenly died instead of gotten cancer that can be treated over time, so my deepest, most sincere condolences go out to you and your pop. I guess I should be grateful that Tim's cancer is one of the more treatable kinds (for anyone curious, he's been diagnosed with stage III lymphoma), so there's very, very little chance of me losing him anytime soon. I'm just glad I got to hug him and tell him I love him knowing what could be (but won't be) on the horizon, and I feel awful that you nor your dad had that opportunity with your uncle. I can not imagine how you or your dad must feel right now. You can't beat yourself up, though, as you are one of the most loving people I know and I'm sure your uncle knew you loved him.
As always, if there's anything I can do or if you want to talk, you have my number. <3
Post by abrakapokus on Dec 13, 2012 18:15:40 GMT -5
Thanks everyone. Your messages, texts, posts, and thoughts mean so much to me. Right now we are busy making plans to go up to West Virginia this weekend so that gives me something to focus on. I've talked to my Dad several times today. Last I spoke with him, he, my mom and my brother were sitting on my uncle's porch with all their dogs. He just had built a large porch when he lost his leg and almost every day you would find him and his dogs sitting on the porch, waving to everyone that passed. He lived a long, good life, getting out of poverty by enlisting, with my Dad, for Vietnam and then being a truck driver. Recently he got to see his only daughter pass her boards and start practicing law. He worked very hard to send her to school so I'm glad he got to see her reach her goals.
Kyle I'm glad to hear that your brother has a very treatable form of cancer. I'm sure with your support he will do just fine. Same goes to you, if you ever need to talk, or just ramble, like I have done, I'm here.
Abra, I am so sorry for your loss. Just reading what you wrote about your uncle, well it made me tear up. I read the love you have for him, and I have no doubt that he knew & felt your love as well. Your inforoo family is here for you & Dave if you need anything.
Post by cinnamon girl on Dec 13, 2012 21:03:30 GMT -5
Sending you nothing but love and positive thoughts Abra!! I'm echoing the sentiments previously expressed in this thread. It's amazing to see the support this forum has for each other. Enjoy the time you have with the rest of your family. It sounds like your uncle truly got to enjoy the last parts of his life....he's very lucky.
Karosko, so glad to hear that you're brother's going to beat this! Hold all your loved ones as close as possible folks!! <3
Also, Krunchykat, I've been in a similar situation, and I truly hope that things have turned out for the better. It was a smart move to forward the text on, and not engage him at that moment.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go on an overnight drunk, and in 10 days I'm going to set out to find the shark that ate my friend and destroy it. Anyone who wants to tag along is more than welcome.
We're all a mess of paradoxes. Believing in things we know can't be true. We walk around carrying feelings too complicated and contradictory to express. But when it all becomes too big, and words aren't enough to help get it all out, there's always music.
Abra and Dave...I LOVE LOVE LOVE you guys! I'm so sorry for the loss. If you need anything at all or just to talk I'm here for you.
You all are right. It is hard to know what to say and even harder to know what you want to hear at a time like this. Sometimes to just know that you are loved by many goes a long way.
As for regrets...there is always something more that you think you could have or should have done. Letit go, my friends, and know that he knew that he was loved by you.
Safe travels this weekend and know that you all are loved very much.
not meaning to hijack this thread from my dear Dave and Abra, but I've been vacillating between "murderous rampage" and "nervous breakdown" for the past 11 hours. I don't typically drink in the daytime, but am seriously considering some Irish cream in my coffee right now. Either that or a happy pill with my grapefruit.
Quick summary: gave consent for the purchasers of my home in the mtns to STORE A FEW ITEMS there prior to closing. I'm a reasonable person and it seemed like a good gesture, maybe thinking that some good karma thrown out there would help the deal along... I decided to drive up last night to watch the meteor showers from the back deck and enjoy a beverage or two, and take in the solitude of the place that I love as well as collect a few items to bring home. Bag packed, I arrive at around 10 pm to find 4 cars in the driveway and through the glass of the front door I could see the great room completely furnished with a LIT Christmas tree (and a TACKY one at that). My rankles were up a bit as I struggled with the locks for both front doors. Finally a female came stumbling out of the door nearest my old bedroom. She didn't introduce herself...I said "ah, I own this house - are you all MOVING in?" to which she replied "yeah the appraisal was done today" I then replied "well I was planning on spending the night here tonight". She said "The realtor didn't say nothing about that" (no grammar points) she didn't invite me into MY house. I could have forced the issue, kicked them out and demanded entry but really wasn't sure what or who else was in there. Decided it best to get the hell out before my temper took over and I went nuts.
Emailed realtor upon leaving and told him to call me ASAP this am. He called me at 8 oclock sharp. While we were discussing the matter and I was explaining my displeasure, the dog started whining to go potty so I stepped in the back yard with him. Of course the door locked behind me. I'm in my pajamas outside locked out, and the girls wouldn't answer their phones (they went to the Hobbit premiere last night and were crashed).
I decided to try the front door on the off chance they had forgotten to lock it. As I cracked the gate open, the dog charged through and is running amok in the front yard, chasing a neighbors car, chasing two ladies out walking and then deciding both to munch on and play with dead squirrel that the karma gods had seen fit to deposit in my front yard.
Finally my daughter heard me yelling and came out to help get the dog.
At this point I'm waiting for the realtor to come up with a damn good solution to this clusterf*ck. I'm tempted to cut off the utilities but still would have the issue of the squatters and not being able to enjoy my house and to have to return to gather my things. I have a stupid dog in the house now with dead squirrel breath.
Today HAS to get better. On second thought, I am going to have that Irish Cream in my next cup. Slainte.
So sorry Abra and Dave. Don't spend any time regretting what could have been. There is nothing you can change at this point. Instead, help you father get through this and love the ones you have left with all you might.
Post by Dave Maynar on Dec 14, 2012 9:52:28 GMT -5
Zen,
It's always surprising to see how people will take advantage of kind gestures. For some reason, my favorite part is how she said that the appraisal had been done. What does that have to do with them moving all their sh*t in? I agree that backing off was the best idea at that point. 10pm is not the best time to start something especially with you not knowing who is in the house, and your stuff still being in the house. Hope that all gets sorted out for you.
not meaning to hijack this thread from my dear Dave and Abra, but I've been vacillating between "murderous rampage" and "nervous breakdown" for the past 11 hours. I don't typically drink in the daytime, but am seriously considering some Irish cream in my coffee right now. Either that or a happy pill with my grapefruit.
Quick summary: gave consent for the purchasers of my home in the mtns to STORE A FEW ITEMS there prior to closing. I'm a reasonable person and it seemed like a good gesture, maybe thinking that some good karma thrown out there would help the deal along... I decided to drive up last night to watch the meteor showers from the back deck and enjoy a beverage or two, and take in the solitude of the place that I love as well as collect a few items to bring home. Bag packed, I arrive at around 10 pm to find 4 cars in the driveway and through the glass of the front door I could see the great room completely furnished with a LIT Christmas tree (and a TACKY one at that). My rankles were up a bit as I struggled with the locks for both front doors. Finally a female came stumbling out of the door nearest my old bedroom. She didn't introduce herself...I said "ah, I own this house - are you all MOVING in?" to which she replied "yeah the appraisal was done today" I then replied "well I was planning on spending the night here tonight". She said "The realtor didn't say nothing about that" (no grammar points) she didn't invite me into MY house. I could have forced the issue, kicked them out and demanded entry but really wasn't sure what or who else was in there. Decided it best to get the hell out before my temper took over and I went nuts.
Emailed realtor upon leaving and told him to call me ASAP this am. He called me at 8 oclock sharp. While we were discussing the matter and I was explaining my displeasure, the dog started whining to go potty so I stepped in the back yard with him. Of course the door locked behind me. I'm in my pajamas outside locked out, and the girls wouldn't answer their phones (they went to the Hobbit premiere last night and were crashed).
I decided to try the front door on the off chance they had forgotten to lock it. As I cracked the gate open, the dog charged through and is running amok in the front yard, chasing a neighbors car, chasing two ladies out walking and then deciding both to munch on and play with dead squirrel that the karma gods had seen fit to deposit in my front yard.
Finally my daughter heard me yelling and came out to help get the dog.
At this point I'm waiting for the realtor to come up with a damn good solution to this clusterf*ck. I'm tempted to cut off the utilities but still would have the issue of the squatters and not being able to enjoy my house and to have to return to gather my things. I have a stupid dog in the house now with dead squirrel breath.
Today HAS to get better. On second thought, I am going to have that Irish Cream in my next cup. Slainte.
WTF is wrong with people? Zen, that's seriously crazy. It was the right thing for you to leave. I probably would have went all grinch bitch and grabbed that ugly tree to drag out the door with me.