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A contraction is when a woman screams like her uterus is slowly being ripped out, and then her uterus slowly rips out. This normally doesn't go on for more than...oh...sixteen or eighteen hours; after which you don't get to sleep or have sex for three months. And dirty diapers become an hourly problem. And you start babbling all the time in what sounds like drunken pig latin. Oh, and you have to start saving for somebody else's college education even though you haven't paid your own off yet.
Anybody who doesn't use birth control might want to reconsider it.
I was hatched from an egg, so this is all very new to me. Go on.
Well, we all were...that's the beauty of it. See, when a man loves a woman very much, he gives her a special kind of hug. And that's why men have nipples.
"The placenta has very high levels of some vitamins such as B6. This is the one that helps out with postpartum depression. The mother can reclaim these vitamins and put them to use in her own body by ingesting the placenta. CRH, a corticotrophin-releasing hormone, normally secreted by the hypothalamus, is well-known to be a stress-reducer. During the last trimester of pregnancy, the placenta secretes high levels of CRH, also pouring great quantities into the expectant mother's bloodstream. And guess what? After birth, the mother has much lower than average levels of this hormone, thus triggering depression. Actually, when so much CRH was being produced during the final weeks of pregnancy, the hypothalamus shut down on its production. After the birth, the hypothalamus hasn't yet kicked into gear and begun to compensate for the low levels of CRH. Voila! A reasonable explanation for postpartum depression and an obvious but overlooked solution."
I've also read that it may stop hemorrhaging by consuming it or putting a piece under your tongue.
April 12-14th - Indio, CA - Coachella Weekend 1
May 3-5th - Memphis, TN - Beale St. Music Festival
June 13-16th - Manchester, TN - Bonnaroo
July 12-14th - Louisville, KY - Forecastle Festival
August 2-4th - Chicago, IL - Lollapalooza
September 27-29th - Atlanta, GA - TomorrowWorld
October 25-27th - Asheville, NC - Mountain Oasis
I did natural childbirth and by the time the placenta came out the last thing I wanted to do was deal with it in any way but now I'm probably paying to put it on my skin. Oh yeah, it's in all kinds of skin care products, hair care products.
Post by abrakapokus on Dec 3, 2012 15:47:02 GMT -5
My kids have been whining way too much about going outside. I think it's time to kick in the, "if it's daylight get your a$$ outta my house!" they way my Mom did.
My kids have been whining way too much about going outside. I think it's time to kick in the, "if it's daylight get your a$$ outta my house!" they way my Mom did.
My mom pulled that on me, too. Except, I still haven't been asked back into the house.
My kids have been whining way too much about going outside. I think it's time to kick in the, "if it's daylight get your a$$ outta my house!" they way my Mom did.
My mom pulled that on me, too. Except, I still haven't been asked back into the house.
My personal favorite was my mom locking us out of the house for 8-10 hours every day and then my father refusing to put on the central air while I just sat in a pool of sweat.
Seriously? Did you not have health education, biology or sex education in your high school?
LOL Tennessee.
Phil doesn't count. He must have slept because we had sex ed in middle school and high school. They divided us up by gender in middle school to keep the giggles down.
I am pretty sure that I only learned about the placenta a few years ago... and I'm a girl (in case you didn't know). I must have not been paying attention...
Welcome back Bonz, but I do not find it strange that your presence being requested in the Orgy thread and then you showing up, like it was the quacking Bonzai Bat Signal.
Phil doesn't count. He must have slept because we had sex ed in middle school and high school. They divided us up by gender in middle school to keep the giggles down.
I went to a private christian school from kindergarten till 8th grade. they def didnt have sex talk. abstinence baby
April 12-14th - Indio, CA - Coachella Weekend 1
May 3-5th - Memphis, TN - Beale St. Music Festival
June 13-16th - Manchester, TN - Bonnaroo
July 12-14th - Louisville, KY - Forecastle Festival
August 2-4th - Chicago, IL - Lollapalooza
September 27-29th - Atlanta, GA - TomorrowWorld
October 25-27th - Asheville, NC - Mountain Oasis
I am pretty sure that I only learned about the placenta a few years ago... and I'm a girl (in case you didn't know). I must have not been paying attention...
In 5th grade in my school district they take every girl in the entire grade and give them "the period talk."
Then in 8th grade they taught our co-ed health class a week-long sex ed.
They had a model placenta, our teacher would call random people he saw walking down the hallway into his room so he could smack them in the face with said model placenta.
Good thing I was a smart ass little mischievous devil growing up and already figured out what sex was at an early age. I wonder how many people are screwed up sexually because of the way it's taught to them.
Post by Don Flamenco on Dec 3, 2012 16:36:01 GMT -5
I never had that class. Sex ed for me was watching a late 70's era Ron Jeremy film with my older brother. I believe it was called Orgy Mania. For some reason Ron was depicted as a shepard, getting it on with multiple chicks in a manger. I was more puzzled as to why he looked like my old hippy uncle Wilson than the alien act.
All and all, very bushy. Still figured out what a placenta was though. ;D
I am pretty sure that I only learned about the placenta a few years ago... and I'm a girl (in case you didn't know). I must have not been paying attention...
In 5th grade in my school district they take every girl in the entire grade and give them "the period talk."
Then in 8th grade they taught our co-ed health class a week-long sex ed.
They had a model placenta, our teacher would call random people he saw walking down the hallway into his room so he could smack them in the face with said model placenta.
Good thing I was a smart ass little mischievous devil growing up and already figured out what sex was at an early age. I wonder how many people are screwed up sexually because of the way it's taught to them.
4th grade we were split up from the girls. We watched a movie that explained we'd start smelling and need deoderant, that our voices would change and we'd get growth spurts, and that hair would start growing all over.
8th grade everyone took a health class that had a sex-ed part but I don't remember too much of it. I can't remember actually getting the stereotypical "here's a banana/cucumber and here's how you put a condom on it"
By 9th grade I had the basics down from health class but it wasn't until watching an actual birth in my biology class (a video we had to get parent's approval of first) that my mind was shattered as to what the human body can withstand. It was eye-opening.
but I do not find it strange that your presence being requested in the Orgy thread and then you showing up, like it was the quacking Bonzai Bat Signal. 
